Tuesday, May 15, 2007

Random Little Bits of Weirdness

Someone once told me that daddy-long-leg spiders have deadly poisons in them, but humans are safe from their bites because their little spider mouths are too tiny ever to bite human skin. For years my gravest fear has been that I’m going to meet the only freak big-mouth daddy-long-legs in the history of the world and no one will ever figure out how I died.

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The women in my family have weird effects on street lights. Especially when we’re together. They go out as we pass under them, or else the ones that are dark will flick back on.

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My cousin will not eat pickles on her sandwich if they don’t have ridges. Smooth pickles are not to be trusted.

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My friend MKA has an actual old-fashioned toothpaste key. She uses it to roll up the tube. I think that is HILARIOUS.

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When my nephew Ethan was about 2 years old, elephants really grossed him out. He didn’t like their leathery wrinkly skin. If he saw one on TV he’d do the Ew Dance: he’d march his baby feet in place, circle his fists at his waist and repeat, “Ew, ew, ew, ew” with a solemn little frown on his face. I always think of this when I see elephants now.

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When I left my last job a lovely board member gave me a little souvenir that he had made for me himself: a hickory nut on a small wooden plaque with a little brass plate that said, “Remember”. And I do. I keep that ‘hicker nut’ on my desk to this day.

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I am totally, thoroughly, hopelessly addicted to tea towels. I have a RIDICULOUS number of them in my kitchen. I look for new Crate & Barrel catalogs only to look at their latest offerings in tea towels.

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When I worked at the Museum of Victoria in Melbourne almost 10 years ago, I took a phone call from a woman who wanted to ask a curator some questions about an Egyptian ring. I was in a completely different office from the curators, but in the interests of taking a detailed message I asked her a few questions about this ring and then at the end I asked her where she got it. “Oh I don’t have it, I dreamed it.” Oh.

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When we were little girls my sister and I used to love a tiny Siamese cat figurine that sat on the whatnot in my grandparents’ living room. It was about 2” high and had 2 aqua rhinestones for eyes. One day we were all alarmed (Kelsey, 'agog') to see that one of its eyes was missing. We searched but couldn’t find it. So my sister and my grandfather made that little cat a tiny pirate’s eyepatch out of paper. It was even more adorable with the patch than it had been without it.

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I love to make cookies, and I love to eat cookie dough, but I do have a rule: you can eat the dough only until you’ve eaten the first cooked cookie. After that the dough is no longer a snack. The cookie process moves inexorably forward.

2 comments:

Daisyface said...

Re the daddy-long legs thing : It's not true. I asked my Dad, he's a pest controller, and he's my Dad, so he must know (he's a very truthful man, except for the time he told me he became superman at night and I went to school and told everyone). He said they have a tiny bit of venom for eating other tiny little bugs and critters but are not poisonous enough to even injure a human. He said you would maybe get a little irritated lump where it bit you, if it could, but that would be all. So now you can relax about the freakishly large and imaginary daddy long legs !

HolyMama! said...

ooooh! i'm so glad to know this, dais face! whoever told that to lala also told that to me.